Thursday, December 28, 2006

Black Christmas

Well, here again I have fallen off the bandwagon of blogging. Sorry, but my job and life has been a little hectic lately.

If you scroll down the right-hand side of the page, you will notice a new counter box. Earlier this month, Joe and I discover that I was pregnant and we probably conceived on our trip to Asheville. While we were very excited, we kept our enthusiasm to a low and I refrained from blogging about it. Mostly becuase we were waiting until Christmas day to tell my dad, and I did not want it out within the family beforehand.

My doctor immediately saw me on the sixth and we got a nice ultrasound of the gestational sac witht the yolk sac inside. This was great since we had never gotten that far before. The next week (on Wednesday) I started spotting and they brought us in. We then had a "fetal pole" which measured 5 weeks and 5 days and we saw the heartbeat. Joe and I started getting very excited at this point.

Last Monday, my middle back started "killing me". oh, it was horrible. That lasted about two days then I started spotting again then had some slight blood Tuesday evening. On Wednesday morning, I called in for an update and they wanted to see me. So I hopped in my car and drove over (again). I saw the heartbeat again and the newly formed little legs. Our baby was now measuring 7 weeks. I asked about the cramping and spotting and the doctor said that 20% of pregnancies have spotting.

So I left with another great ultrasound picture. I was mentally feeling better since I had read that if you see the heartbeat within the 7 to 10 week mark, you decrease you chance of miscarriage by 60%.

Guess I fell into that 40%. I went back to work and that afternoon I was cramping something terrible. I asked my boss if I could go home and rest since I would be the only one in the office the next day. I went home early and took a bath. I felt better and was popping Tylenol according to the directions the doctor's office gave me. This was around 3:30.

Joe came inside and we talked about the visit and we reviewd our ultrasounds, etc.

*****Some might consider this TMI, so skip ahead to the next set of stars if you are fainthearted****
About 6:00 I went to the bathroom and heard "clunk, clunk". I looked down and I was now heavily bleeding and passing large clots. I immediately went upstairs to relax in another bath. I debated on whether or not to call my doctor. I had been told that unless I was having the "worst period of my life", I should not worry and come back at my next appointment in January.

AS many of my good friends would know, I have had extrememly bad periods in my life. So bad, I have been crawling on the floor begging for relief. I used to be on Anaprox which was the heavier, prescrption form of Aleve WWWAAAYYY before Aleve ever came out. So, needless to say, I was in pain but it wasn't the worst.

So, as any young lady would do during a bath - I had two choices 1. read a book or 2. talk on the phone. So I called up two of my dearest friends and was talking to them. As I was talking with my second friend and we were discussing doctor, I looked down and thought, "Hmm...that doesn't look right." I reached down between my legs and in my hand was my baby inside it's sack. Talk about trauma. I said "OMG, OMG." My friend said WHAT?" and I told her. She immediately started crying and she said she was calling our family priest immediately and asked which hospital I would be going to.
So needless to say our Family priest and our dear friend S came over that evening. We blessed the baby and named it Mary Joseph. We had a small graveside service Saturday morning for a burial. Joe and I purchsaed a heart shaped puzzle box as a casket. It was slightly bigger than the palm of my hand. Inside we placed two heart shape cut outs from a receiving blanket we would have used. Each of us wrote our own message on our own heart. We also put a lock of hair from each of us in it along with a heart shaped picture of Joe and I together on vacation.

Our little one was buried two days before Christmas at St. Lawrence Catholic Cemetary on the Charleston penninsula. A tiny cement cross and a tiny plaque with their name is all that distinguishes ours from the rows of tiny cement crosses of stilborns and little ones that didn't live very long.

So, needless, to say, our Christmas was not a good Christmas. But however bad, it truly brought Joe and I together more and realized what good friends we have. Anyone who would be willing to come out two days before Christmas to support your friends burying their seven week gestational baby, is a true friend.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006


Well, Thanksgiving turned out a bunch of surprises for us.

1. We got an AWESOME appraisal back on my house. (my closing is tomorrow)

2. It snowed in Charleston Tuesday morning, November 21st

3. My parents came down on Wednesday and stayed all the way through Sunday. They LOVE the house and what we have done with it.

For Thanksgiving, I prepared my first Turkey. (yeah!!)

Here is everything I made for our meal:

Citrus and Herb Turkey
Italian Sausage Stuffing
Chiptole Mashed Sweet Potatoes
Homemade Maccaroni and Cheese
Green Bean Casserole
Fresh Cranberry and Orange Relish
and Citrus and Herb Pan Gravy

Boy! Where we stuffed!! Everything was excellent!! My mom was weary and tried making me do things her way, but I stood my ground. The night before I stufed the turkey with orages, lemons, onion and fresh herbs. I made the Herb seasoning rub and rubbed it on the turkey and put it back in teh fridge. In the morning I took it out, let it rest and warm up, and popped it into the oven and cooked according to th directions. (not using an "Oven Bag" like my mother had wanted) an Presto! a scrumptious, moist Turkey. Wow. It was the moistest Turkey I have had for Thanksgiving in a LONG time. Usually, a family member (not my mom) makes the Turkey and it is SO dry.

So, I had to give myself a big pat on the back.

I hope your Thanksgiving was full of wonderful surprises and many blessings!

One Wild Night

I have A LOT of catching up to do. The weekend of the 10-11th, Joe and I went to the upstate to stage my house for an appraisal for my refinancing. On the way home I was about 3 miles ahead of Joe, cruising at 75-ish, just past Orangeburg (i.e. - I'm in the middle of the boonies), and I hit something in the road - hard. I immediately got over b/c I KNEW I had blown my tire. I immediately called Joe so that he wouldn't pass me.

So we unload my trunk to get out my spare and tire iron, etc. Well, needless to say this wasn't your ordinary tire change.

See... I got all new tires back in March - and wouldn't you know it - the bolts where on TIGHT!!!

How tight? You might ask. Let's see, we broke not one but TWO lug wrenches. Before we broke the second one, Joe tried using the wieght of the car to help. Let's just say that they were on so tight that it LIFTED my Camry off the ground. After that, we finally called 911 who directed us to *HP who directed us to another number (which was closed), so we called *HP back to see if we could get a trooper out.

By the time the nice trooper came, we had already been out there 2 1/2 HOURS! He (THANK GOD) had one of the 4-lug wrench. The kind tha tlook like an X. It took Joe pulling up and the trooper JUMPING UP AND DOWN on the wrench in order to get the lug bolts off. Luckily they weren't stripped or broken.

They put the tire on and it was flat! (excellent) So the trooper gave me permission to drive down the shoulder the two miles to the truck stop down the way. Had we know that there was a truck stop two miles down the way - I would have sent Joe for another wrench way before that.

So our normal 3 hour trip to 6 hours to get from the upstate back home to beautiful Charleston.

So - what shoudl everyone learn from this leasson??? Make sure that Firestone or whoever, backs off your bolts a 1/4 turn when they screw them on with the torque guns. AND always have a Cross style lug wrench in your car. Wal-mart has them for $7.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

More Stuffed than a Thanksgiving Turkey


So Dear hubby took me to Candelight Christmas at Biltmore. After Joe got out of the presentations, we went driving along the Parkway. We didn't see much so we went shopping while we waited for our reservations. We entered the Estate about 4:30 and proceeded to the Deerpark restaurant. We were one of the first tables sat.


We feasted on Baked Brie with praline pecan sauce, Sweetpotate soufle with praline pecan topping and chipotle pepers, Trout Mondine, Prim Rib (we put the praline pecan sauce on this as well!), Turkey with sausage stuffing with Sherried pan gravy. They also had oysters, clams, mussels and peel and eat shrimp. Along with an assortment of salads (I had the Waldorf Salad). They also had Split-pea Soup and Minestrone.

For dessert we had Bananas Foster over Vanilla Ice Cream, Pumkin Cream Pie, Red Velvet Cake, Chocolate Torte, Blueberry Cobbler, Applie tart, and I can't remember if there was anything. Basically all the desserts were yuck except the Flambe station where they created the Bananas Foster. I had to have two servings of that. Hey! I told you I was more stuffed than a Turkey.

Oh.....but it was SOOOOOO Good!!! I think I now need to go to confession for my glutony. ;-)

Afterwards, we went to the car and drove to the house. This year they did MP3 players with headsets for the tour. The house was beautiful and so were the decorations.

I was very excited because they have added new rooms and a new route (on the third and fourth floors) to the tour.

So we had a wonderful night at the Biltmore Estate. I highly recommend it.


Sunday, November 05, 2006

On Holiday

Or as we in America like to call it, On Vacation. I think I like the European title and so will use it for this brief jont to the mountains with my DH. He is giving a presentation tomorrow and Tuesday to the N.C. Society of Tax Professionals.

So we started off today at 2 p.m. It took me 2 hours and 45 minutes to drive from our house to Reidville Road in Spartanburg. (Excellent, almost a new record for me. I have made it from my parents house all the way to IOP (that's Isle of Palms for all you non-Charlestonians) in three hours.

So DH and I had dinner with my parents at Outback. Very poor service and might I say skimpy on their salads. So after that quick break we headed on up the hills. Too bad most of our winter clothes are in storage. Can you say brrrr..............?????

So we are now in the lovely Mariott Renaissance hotel in downtown Asheville. I haven't a clue what I shall be doing tomorrow while the hubby is away. (probably sleep, read, and watch t.v.)

After D.H. is finished with his group we are going for a drive down the Parkway (i.e. The BlueRidge Parkway) to see some fall color. Since we live in Charleston, there isn't very much fall color around us. Unless you count the slight browning of the Palmetto trees as they shed the older fronds for new ones.

DH surprised me a few weeks ago with tickets to Candelight Christmas so at 5:30 we will be dining at the Deerparkrestaurant on Biltmore Estate and then will enter the house at 7:30 for the Christmas Candelight Tour at Biltmore. I am so excited. We used to be passholders but aren't anymore. Christmas is the only season I have not seen Biltmore, usually because I wasn't paying the extra money to see it at night and I can't stand crowds nor heavy traffic. Every time I have tried to go I have gotten backed up on I-40. Sorry, but if it's backed up that far, it isn't worth it.

So I brought the warmest skirt I currently have in my closet and hopefully with layers, will be warm enough.

I also hope to have a little time to blog a bit.

I see that SCGG [slacker! ;) ] got a job (Congrats!), BTCM is almost to the end of the alphabet (beautiful moon this month, btw. should have seen it low in the horizon and beautiful in Chas, and looking great here in NC), and Napoleon is still off having "fun" at law school. Btw, your blog makes me want to run out and eat seafood somewhere.

Well...I better go. DH has ironed each of his shirts and is on to polishing his shoes. I might be able to get him to iron my shirts before I slip in to something a little more "comfortable" and left over from our honeymoon.

Hey.....this is a vacation!!! ;)

Friday, October 27, 2006

New Photos and Virtual Tour

Here is a link to new photos and a virtual tour of our home.

Vitrual Tour

Monday, October 16, 2006

Happy Anniversary to Us!

So yesterday was our First Anniversary!! We were going to go out of town but with the house on the market, we decided against it. SO my DH made reservations at 82 Queen where we had our reception that time last year. Needless to say they botched our reservations and gave away our table but luckily the people left (tourists!) and we at least got to sit there while we had our desert (creme brulee for me, praline pecan peach cobbler with cinnamon ice cream for him) and sipped our frangelico (hazelnut liquor). Dinner was so-so for me and Joe was the winner for best dinner.

Most of the day earlier had been guessed it - working on the house. After dinner we headed to (of all places) Walmart. Yep, we spent the evening at good 'ole Wally World. No, we aren't rednecks we just really needed some things for the house (i.e. toilet paper - who knew two men could go through toilet paper so fast???) and we eneded up getting a few other things like some palm trees for our patio, some material for new headcoverings, etc.... It's amazing how time flies when you are in Walmart. We got there between 7:30 and 8:00 and wouldn't you know - before long it was 10:00!!!

After we left 82 Queen we headed down to the port to see the cruise ship that had come in. It was the Carnival Victory. Now last year we left out on the Triumph on Tuesday, October 18th, so this year they upped the schedule a bit. It was great to see the ship and we reminisced about how we saw our ship for the first time and we got excited - even though the cruise was horrible.
We did do a quick drive around town (with the sunroof back) taking the same route our carriage did when we left 82 Queen headed to 2 Meeting to begin our honeymoon.

Since this Anniversary is supposed to be "paper" - we decided on this as a present for each other. When we saw this at Christmas we knew we had to get it. You can't see it very well from thsi photos but it is a couple remembering their wedding day and you can see their "ghosts" with their family in the bandstand and a vis a vis carriage awaiting them to whisk them away. hopefully we will get this print this week and have it matted and framed.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006


We have done it. Our home is now For Sale. We have a home on James Island which we will be submitting an offer on in the next couple of days!! Yeah!!! Once we have it under contract - I will post the house we are buying.

3213 Wynnefield Drive for sale

Friday, September 22, 2006


So my dad had the bright idea to remove the folder containing all of my images off our company's website. So all of the images have disappeared. So please be patient while we wait for him to restore the folder.


My Life.....

My Life:

So what's going on in the D household, you might ask? Well here is a list:

1. We got married in the Catholic Church on August 5th
2. Have been remodeling our bathrooms upstairs (lighting, flooring, paint, etc..)
3. finished the downstairs bathroom remodel
4. finished painting the family room, dining room, Kitchen and breakfast area
5. bought several new toys (shop vac for Joe, Carpet cleaner for me)
6. started looking for a home on James Island
7. Put an offer on a home in James Island
8. Started a Bible Study class
9. had said above offer rejected
10. continuing to look at homes on JI

These are also not in any particular order. So as you can see, we have been pretty busy.

I have to say that I LOVE my new Bissell carpet cleaner!! And Joe loves his new 20 gal shop vac. WE are putting our house on the market and trying to find a home on James Island. We found a home and put an offer on it, and the sellers made us a little upset so we opted not to continue to negotiate with them. So we are still looking. It's interesting with the different housing markets. Our current limit is $275K. On James Island most of the homes are 13-1500sqft, brick ranch homes. Where we live, we could have a house built for that amount. In the upstate we could own a beautiful home in Greenville's Sugar Creek or some other fancy-schmancy neighborhood and in Spartanburg County- we could get a massive monstrocity for that amount. Here, we are looking at homes that are barely cutting it. Yesterday, we drove around at lunch time to see what we could find. I found some areas that I like and we went back and I got our agent to show us homes yeaterday. One is 2100 sqft, but that's b/c they convereted the garage. Its on a little pond but I dont' know. The pond was a little scuzy for my taste. It's still a contender though. My criteria is at least 1800, 3/2 and a two-car garage. So to see the homes we did (other than the first) I dropped the sqftg criteria and the garage criteria.

OMG! I can't even talk about the homes we saw. The last one we saw was interesting, to say the least. I HAD to call my mother IMMEDIATELY when I got home. Why? you might ask. That's because


The last home we looked at was small and WAY UNDER our price range - and it was close to the beach (REALLY close - like 5 minutes). Hm? I thought- wonder why. Well, once we got there - I found out. Because it was a "manufactured home". Now, up where I'm from they call these TRAILERS.

Not that I considered for a moment living there - but I had to see this. Why? Well, because I'm female and once I saw this I was curious. Now, what could be so curious about a trailer???


That's right - stilts. I HAVE SEEN IT ALL NOW!! Now, you always hear how dangerous it is to live in these things anyways, and it's close to the beach (a mile or so). And you constantly hear that they get picked up by tornados all the time - so YOU PUT IT ON STILTS????? HELLO????? Are we now trying to help it on it's way up?????

So Click here to see one of these homes up on stilts
So I have seen it all now. Last year it was a dilapidated home in downtown for $190K (we are talking falling-through-the floors, can-look-through-the-walls-to-see-your-neighbors, every-other-town-in-America-would-have-condemned-it- house) and now this. What will someone think of next???
Now: I'm going to send out some LURVE to SCGG who recently got sacked from her job. My understanding is that this is a good/bad thing, but haven't had my email responded to. I hope everything is better now!!!
I'm also going to shout out to Napoleon who we miss very much around here and he seems to be enjoying our nation's capital.
And last, definetly not least - to my BFF Jessi and her husband Brian who became first time homeowners today in HOT-lanta!!!! (Well, just outside Atlanta)

So Happy Friday to all - I promise not to be such a stranger!!!!!

Much Love and Blessings!!!

Friday, August 18, 2006

To Joe


by: Anne Bradstreet (c.1612-1672)

F ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were lov'd by wife, then thee.
If ever wife was happy in a man,
Compare with me, ye women, if you can.
I prize thy love more than whole Mines of gold
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that Rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought but love from thee give recompetence.
Thy love is such I can no way repay.
The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.
Then while we live, in love let's so persevere
That when we live no more, we may live ever.

Do you ever......

DO you ever have one of those days where you just wish you could go back to bed and start over?? The kind of day which test your work, marriage, religious beliefs, friendships, etc?????

I'm having one of those days...ah...weeks. Today has been especially rough. I have spent the majority of the morning trying not to cry the tears which continually cloud my eyes.

I'm not going to go into specifics but appreciate any prayers.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

It's a Boy!!

Merlin Matthew

Born 12:09 Central Time

Weight: 7 lbs 2.5 ounces

Height: 19.5 inches

Full head of black hair and blue eyes

Looks like his mother

We wish Brett and Rachel many wonderful blessings

Friday, August 04, 2006

So Sad......

Today is Napoleon's last day here at our office. We will certainly miss his smiling face, his jokes, and his "impeccable" punctuality. On Monday morning, we won't know what to do! While we all love him and will miss him, it is our own selfishness wanting him to stay. We wish him all the best at law school and at whatever life has to offer him!!


Wednesday, July 26, 2006

More on Modesty at Mass

Here is a caption from Pope Benedict XV's encyclical Sacra Propedium

19. From this point of view one cannot sufficiently deplore the blindness of so many women of every age and condition; made foolish by desire to please, they do not see to what a degree the in decency of their clothing shocks every honest man, and offends God. Most of them would formerly have blushed for those toilettes as for a grave fault against Christian modesty; now it does not suffice for them to exhibit them on the public thoroughfares; they do not fear to cross the threshold of the churches, to assist at the Holy sacrifice of the Mass, and even to bear the seducing food of shameful passions to the Eucharistic Table where one receives the heavenly Author of purity. And We speak not of those exotic and barbarous dances recently imported into fashionable circles, one more shocking than the other; one cannot imagine anything more suitable for banishing all the remains of modesty.

Modesty starts with purification of the heart

A Pastoral Letter by Most Rev. John W. Yanta, Bishop of Amarillo

June 18, 2006
Feast of the Body and Blood of Christ

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

As the hot weather has descended on us and we are in summertime or vacation time, it is appropriate to speak of modesty of dress especially in participation in the Holy Eucharist, the receiving of Our Lord in Holy Communion, the privilege of being a lector of the Sunday Bible Readings, and serving as an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion.

This time of the year, I (and am sure many of you also) hear complaints about a lack of respect and reverence for the house of God, the sacredness of the Lord’s presence in the liturgy, and lack of respect for others and the lack of consciousness of the battle for purity in which the opposite sex finds itself even while attending Sunday Mass.

Immodesty in dress is governed by two citations from God’s Law:

1) The Ninth Commandment: “You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife” (Exodus 20:17);

2) Jesus said: “Everyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28).

To live our daily Faith as children of God (baptism), disciples of Jesus, and temples of the Holy Spirit, we are faced with moral choices constantly, many times a day. Conscience can either make a right judgment in accordance with reason and the divine law, or on the contrary, an erroneous judgment that departs from them (CCC: Catechism of the Catholic Church #1799).

Dressing or putting on one’s clothes is a moral act and wearing them is a moral act. There are different appropriate modes of dress for different occasions, e.g. in the privacy of our home, with our spouse only or with our children in our home, at work or school, in mixed company, at the lake or swimming pool, grocery shopping, at church, etc.

The four cardinal virtues are in play here (Wisdom 8:5-7). The wise person is guided by wisdom, the highest of riches that guides us to be prudent (doing and saying the right thing), justice (respects the dignity of other persons), fortitude (courage to go against popular, suggestive, provocative styles), and temperance (insures mastery over sensual temptations as occasions of sin). You can read more about these four cardinal virtues that play a pivotal role in our lives (CCC 1803-1809).

Our condition – all of us are beset with concupiscence. Concupiscence or covetousness: “Human appetites or desires that are disordered due to the temporal consequences of original sin, which remain even after Baptism and which produce inclination to sin” (CCC, Glossary).

St. John identifies and distinguishes the three kinds of inclinations of all human beings: “For all that is in the world, sensual lust, enticement for the eyes, and a pretentious life, is not from the Father but is from the world”(I John 2:16).

The road to modesty starts with the purification of the heart: “Out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, fornication…” (Matthew 15:19). Bible beginners should be encouraged to get the basic overview of Jesus’ teaching by starting with the beatitudes in Matt. 5 in Jesus’ first sermon: “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God” (Matt. 5:8). Part of the essence of that teaching is a wholesome, orthodox, first hand appreciation of God’s plan for our sexuality - its sacredness, its fulfillment in marriage, its place in family, Church, and world.

The Catechism speaks next, after the purification of the heart, about “the battle for purity”. We, the baptized and the forgiven in the Sacrament of Penance/Reconciliation struggle against concupiscence of the flesh and disordered desires (CCC 2520).

“Purity requires modesty, an integral part of temperance. Modesty protects the intimate center of the person. It means refusing to unveil what should remain hidden (CCC 2521).

“Modesty is decency. It inspires one’s choice of clothing. It is discreet (CCC 2522).

“There is a modesty of the feelings as well as of the body. It protests, for example, against the voyeuristic explorations of the human body in certain advertisements, or against the solicitations of certain media that go too far in the exhibition of intimate things. Modesty inspires a way of life which makes it possible to resist the allurements of fashion and the pressures of prevailing ideologies (CCC 2523).

“Teaching modesty to children and adolescents means awakening in them respect for the human person (CCC 2524).

“Christian purity requires a purification of the social climate. It requires of the communications media that their presentations show concern for respect and restraint (CCC 2525).

“So-called moral permissiveness rests on an erroneous conception of human freedom; the necessary precondition for the development of true freedom is to let oneself be educated in the moral law. Those in charge of education can reasonably be expected to give young people instruction respectful of the truth, the qualities of the heart, and the moral and spiritual dignity of man” (CCC 2526).

Yes, we can help the devil in many ways including the way we dress. In the Act of Contrition we promise “to avoid the near occasion of sin”. St. Paul writes about “provoking another” (Gal. 5:26).

The key to all modesty is rooted in our mother and daddy who model modesty for their children, i.e. a strong, but tender St. Josephlike husband and father who is blessed with a wonderful wife and mother for their children. “Happy the husband of a good wife…choicest of his blessings is a modest wife, priceless her chaste person” (Sirach 26: 1, 15).

When the community of believers comes together for the Eucharist (Mass) let no one be a distraction from Jesus or provide temptation (an occasion of sin) to another because of our manner of dress.

Lectors, Extraordinary Eucharistic Ministers, and Hospitality Ministers should model modesty of dress for the parish as parents do in the family, the domestic church.

May we cherish and bear witness to the virtues of prudence, temperance, chastity, and modesty for the sake of our own salvation and of others. St. Mary and St. Joseph, St. Ann and St. Joachim, parents and grandparents of their son and grandson, Jesus, intercede for us!

Sincerely in Christ,

Most Rev. John W. Yanta
Bishop of Amarillo


by Bishop John W. Yanta

Basics of modesty in dress

From the Catechism

“There are differences between male and female: physical, emotional, and spiritual differences. These differences result, by God’s plan, in a beautiful complementarity oriented toward the goods of marriage and the flourishing of family life” (CCC 2333).

“Men and women are equal but not the same obiously. There is equal personal dignity. Each of the two sexes is an image of the power and tenderness of God” (CCC 2334-5).

“The virtue of chastity comes under the cardinal virtue of temperance, which seeks to permeate the passions and appetites of the senses with reason” (CCC 2341).

“Christ is the model of chastity. Every baptized person is called to lead a chaste life, each according to his particular state of life” (CCC 2394).

“Temperance: The cardinal moral virtue that moderates the attraction of pleasure and provides balance in the use of created goods. It ensures the mastery of the will over instinct, and keeps natural desires within proper limits” (CCC Glossary).

From the Dictionary

Modesty: “Propriety in dress, speech or conduct” (Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate p.798).

Dress, Apparel, Clothing: “Covering, adornment, or appearance appropriate or peculiar to a particular time” (Webster’s p.380).

Propriety: “Fear of offending against conventional rules of behavior esp. between the sexes; the customs and manners of polite society” (Webster’s p.997).

Compendium of the Catechism

“Purity requires modesty which, while protecting the intimate center of the person, expresses the sensitivity of chastity. It guides how one looks at others and behaves toward them in conformity with the dignity of persons and their communion. Purity frees one from wide-spread eroticism and avoids those things which foster morbid curiosity. Purity also requires a purification of the social climate by means of a constant struggle against moral permissiveness which is founded on an erroneous concept of human freedom” (Compendium of the Catechism 530).

On Reverence

“The Church, the house of God, is… the privileged place of the real presence of Christ in the Blessed Sacrament” (CCC 2691).

Excerpts from a Homily Given by Fr. Dominic Mary, MFVA on EWTN Televised Mass (6-14-05)

“Included in the virtue of modesty is not only humility, but also in how one externally dresses (cf. John Hardon, Modern Catholic Dictionary, p. 356). But many today have rejected to practice this virtue so desperately needed in our current culture. Even to the most casual observer, immodesty in dress is seen as common place in our Churches.

We have got to do all we can to help people to wake up and realize they are dressing way too immodestly, especially when it comes to entering a Church to worship God. We must be like the Vatican - just one example (cf., www. - When there are heat waves in Rome the Vatican dress police, neatly dressed in pants, shirts and ties, turn back all tourists in shorts and bare shoulders trying to get into St. Peter’s Basilica. I’ve seen them do this with my own eyes. These immodestly dressed people have to go and buy paper pants and shirts from vendors eagerly waiting outside.

“Many people come to Church dressed like they are ready to go to the beach. You should not come to Church dressed in shorts, miniskirts, swimsuits, bikinis, tank-tops, bare shoulders, low cut dresses, very tight fitting clothing, etc. “We must return to having a holy fear for God and for His true Presence in the Eucharist and for being in His house. How can we expect to grow in the spiritual life if we are dressed like we don’t care? How dare we approach the Holy Eucharist dressed like we are going to the beach.

“When a person dresses immodestly he or she can become an occasion of sin for other people. And this is the fashion for today. Each year it seems that the latest fashion is to see how little clothing one can wear and how much of one’s body can be shown. And what flesh is not shown is revealed by extremely tight clothing.

“To knowingly and intentionally dress like this is sinful, and can be even seriously sinful, because one can become a temptation to sin for other people. We are all weak and can easily fall into many sins of impurity by someone else’s immodesty.

“Before we go out or buy new clothes we should do a modesty check”. Fr. Hathaway, FSSP on Modesty of Dress at Holy Mass

“We will speak on dress for women and men at the Holy Mass... especially on Sunday.

“But let me preface that I did not wake up this morning thinking, “I wonder how I can ruin their day?” I do not want to make you mad, but only advance your salvation. Our dress can be a touchy topic... but all of us should want to correct errors should they exist.

“First, we should give a definition. Modesty in dress is the virtue which regulates the type of clothing and the manner of its wearing so that it conforms to the purposes by which clothing is worn. Now the purpose of clothing is to protect against the weather, to reveal status or position or formality in society, and to preserve decency.

“Now how should women dress at Holy Mass?

“Indecency of women’s dress at the Holy Sacrifice is not a new thing. In 1921, Pope Benedict XV (Sacra propediem) lamented the indecent dress of women at Holy Mass this way: ‘ cannot sufficiently deplore the blindness of so many women of every age and condition; made foolish by a desire to please, they do not see to what degree the indecency of the clothing shocks every honest man, and offends God.

“Most of them would formerly have blushed for those toiletries as for a grave fault against Christian modesty; now it does not suffice for them to exhibit them on public thoroughfares; they do not fear to cross the threshold of the churches, to assist at the holy sacrifice of the Mass, and even to bear the seductive food of shameful passions to the Eucharistic Table where one receives the heavenly author of purity.

“Now how should a man dress at the Holy Sacrifice?

“If women exceed the virtue, it is common for men to come up short in practicing the virtue of modesty in dress. Men, we are inclined to be careless or slovenly about what we wear... (even at Holy Mass); and young men are prone to deliberately neglect their dress so as to attract attention.

“At Holy Mass, men should wear a coat and tie; or, at least, a collared shirt and nice slacks.

“Young men must be taught that baggy pants are not appropriate; that their hair be nicely cut and combed; that shirts be clean and without slogans or cross bones or a dragon,... or anything which may give Satan the appearance of being honored”.

On Galveston-Houston Archdiocese Website

“The Norms for the Distribution and Reception of Communion Under Both Kinds refers to reverent attire (cf. #29) but does not describe what is considered reverent. Does the Diocese of Galveston-Houston have guidelines describing what is considered appropriate attire for liturgical ministers?”

“Extraordinary Ministers should be appropriately dressed when distributing Communion during the liturgy. On several occasions I have directed that men, including young men, must wear a coat, and women modest dresses or pant suits. This directive is to be observed even for Youth Masses.”

The Liturgical Commission of the Archdiocese of Brisbane, Australia

“I am often asked about the dress requirements for people who perform the roles of readers and special ministers of communion in a parish.

“This usually comes about because complaints have been made about the way these liturgical ministers present themselves at Mass.

“A good place to begin tackling this question is to revisit the meaning of the word ‘ministry’. Readers and special ministers serve the liturgy and the gathered assembly by proclaiming the Word of God and helping in the distribution of the sacred elements. Their manner of dress should reflect the importance and dignity of the ministry in which they serve. “The term ‘Sunday best’ is sometimes used to describe what is acceptable. This does not mean expensive or fancy, but it does mean clothing that is neat, clean and reasonably modest. Outlandish or clattering jewelry, tee shirts with slogans or insignia, jogging outfits or see-through clothing are probably universally considered inappropriate.

“Liturgical ministers become channels of God’s presence when they carry out their ministry. Anything that blocks that channel – whether gesture, demeanor or clothing – is out of place. If a reader’s dress attracts the attention of the assembly rather than what he or she is proclaiming, or if a communion minister’s outfit prevents communicants focusing on receiving the Body and Blood of Christ, then something is clearly amiss”.

Ministers of Hospitality (Archdioces of Brisbane, Australia).)

“Because all liturgical ministers, by their demeanor and attitude, send a message about the importance of what is taking place, it is helpful if they are attired in their ‘Sunday best’. “

In some parishes, ministers wear a uniform blazer for visibility so that they can be identified immediately in case of an emergency. In either case, a nametag identifying a person as a minister of hospitality would be helpful.

Diocese of Trenton, NJ

“Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion should dress in secular clothing that is modest, clean, and appropriate for worship.

“If the local parish decides to use special dress for its Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion, it must be distinctive and not confused with the dress of a priest or deacon.”

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Second Wedding

Most people only plan one wedding in their life- especially to the same person. I, however, am in the process of planning my second wedding to my darling husband.

Our second will be a small ceremony, not unlike the first, at our parish. We are eagerly anticipating the date we can have our marriage convalidated. Basically meaning that it will become valid in the "eyes" of the Church.

Here is the dress I purchased for our wedding. It is a lovely shade of light Ivory and has beading on the bodice and a lovely, flowing chiffon skirt. My first gown was special and with it being strapless - is completely not appropriate for church. This ceremony is more low key so I wanted something bridal but low key as well. Not a big wedding gown.

When I got home to show my darling husband my new dress, I threw on my original veil just for kicks. He LOVED it!!!

One of my DEAR friends, C, suggested I purchase another veil (before I tried on mine again). I chose this one. But Joe has talked me out of it and said it would be better to tie in the original wedding with this one. And also since most of the women coming to the ceremony will be veiled, Mine will stand out more.

We also decided to do a barbecue at our house later that afternoon/evening for the guests. This is totally different then the elegant dinner at 82 Queen we had for our first reception. Since the wedding is low key - so will the party. Greg has been doing an awesome job of grilling and smoking on the grill lately. So far we have decided on ribs, pulled pork, and chicken as the main fare and of course all the sides to go with it!

More details will come!!!!

Monday, July 24, 2006

Fell off the wagon...

Recently I have fallen of the blogging wagon, so it's about time I got back on. You know it's bad when Napoleon says I need to blog.

So what's new? Let's see. The downstairs of our home is almost finished. The dining room is gorgeous and I love the living area. We bought a new stainless steel dishwasher courtesy of Lowe's clearance sale and Joe and Greg installed it on Saturday.

Here at work we are preparing for Napoleon's departure to law school. His smiling face will certainly be missed. We have been working hand in hand the past couple of months. I am excited about the changes, once again with the office. It had been originally decided that my boss would have two Administrative Assistants. I have been the main and the other has been a backup (Napoleon), and someone with whom the Office of Planning shares. I think that plan has gone down the tubes. We had a wonderful temp in Thursday and Friday. Hopefully she will be back. A new desk has been brought in for my move to another desk. I would be outside my boss's office and the other person will sit at my (current) desk and will be a Receptionist instead of being an Administrative Assistant. We shall just see what happens.

Let's see what else.....oh, my OB/GYN called me on Friday. He was on vacation when we had the m/c. Anyways, we have a plan now. When I have another BFP, I am to call him immediately and we will schedule an appointment and blood work will be drawn that day. Then probably every two or more days I will go in for more bloodwork to watch the HCG levels go up or down. Unlike the meany who saw us the day we had the m/c, he does not believe we should seek infertility treatment. First we don't believe in most treatements and second he feels (as we do) that it will be a waste of time and money at this point.

We had a wonderful time this weekend. His Eminence, Francis Cardinal Arinze was in town as a guest of Bishop Baker. He was the main celebrant of mass at the Cathedral on Sunday and gave a wonderful homily. Afterwards, there was a small reception. We all were able to line up to greet Cardinal Arinze. Being a convert, I was previously informed how to kneel and kiss his ring. I saw many people kneeling and kissing his hand. This was ignorance on their part- but it's not everyday that you have a Cardinal around, or the Bishop for that matter. Anyways, so I had my opportunity to kneel and kiss his ring. As for kissing a bishop or cardinal's ring, a bishop is a modern day apostle. Apostles are appointed by Christ and the ring signifies this divine appointment. To kiss a bishop or cardinal's ring is an act of great humility as it acknowledges that divinity.

Thanks for all the patience and prayers!!

Friday, July 07, 2006

Happy Friday!

So the pregnant lady is NOT in a chipper mood today. (Go figure)I slept the entire commute in this morning and I am SO ready to go home. I thought this morning I would just write some idol thoughts.

Superman Returns Sucks

ok, I won't give any spoilers but here goes. My dad bought tickets to the 6:00 showing of Superman Returns 3-D at the Charleston Imax. For those of you who don't know Imax, it's a 5 story screen and 12,000 watts of surround sound. So the preview looks hilarious of some character movie coming to Imax 3-D. It left such an impression that I can't even remember the name. Oh well. Anywho... 1/2 way through the movie, we had a power outage. Now, the actual outage lasted all of 10 seconds but it was enough to stop the movie and reset the sound. In other words, "time's up folks, come get a rain checque." So my DH went down and stood in line for over an hour getting us tickets for next week (they have been sold out each day since it premiered). I think I'm going to let Joe, Dad and Greg go because to tell you the truth, the movie is horrible. It is NOT worth my time sitting through it AGAIN.

and the crabbines continues....

My BIL (brother -in-law) is "supposed" to be leaving TN this morning and be driving down here to live with us (for a short while) and then move out to his own place here in Charleston. I've been hearing this story for 18 months. I'll believe it when I see him pull in the driveway. He and my DH are supposed to be setting up our company again and start working on some projects.

Meanwhile I will be making sure hearts aren't being broken all along the Carolina coast. Ladies, he may be handsome and sweet but he's not the type to be "settling down" (again). At leat not right now. Who knows, people can change. (doubtful but probable)

It is dark and gray and I would so like to be back in bed. No morning sickness yet but I am definetly tired. As each day passes we are getting more and more excited. We were deeply dissapointed in January when two days later we miscarried. Our first appointment is July 26th. Hopefully we will have an ultrasound showing our little sack and our little "bean". If we are REALLY lucky, we will be able to see the heartbeat at that appointment. If not, we will see it at the next one. We will definetly be posting pictures so stay tuned!

Happy Friday!!

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Friday, June 30, 2006


The second reading for the Office of Readings today is 1 Samuel 25:14 - 39. This is the story of Abigail. It is one of my favorite studies and why I chose to write about it today. She is truly a fantastic woman and wife. Now her husband, Nabal, is a jerk. He has not treated her well at all. So here comes David wanting homage for protecting Nabal's property and the Nabal says "go take a hike". But the servants went to Abigail and told her. Now, she could have been an obedient wife to Nabal and not done anything. But she was obedient to GOD and God's servant, David. David even recognized this and thanked HER for keeping HIM safe from doing something that would have done him harm in God's eyes. There is a lesson here: We should not seek revenge, God will take care of everything. For Abigail, he got her out of her marriage and what isn't in this passage, but is in the very next line, is that David asks her to marry him. So God raises her up from this lowly, pathetic man, and gives her as bride to David. Nabal got his in the end as well. Abigail saved David from sin and David got a very smart and virtuous wife.

Now that is blessings upon blessings.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Solemnity of Saints Peter & Paul

I thought the Gosepl reading from today's Mass and the Second Reading from the Office of Readings was extremely poignant. So I am putting them in my blog today for those that do not attend Mass or do not participate in the Liturgy of the Hours.

A great resource is Universalis


Matthew 16:13 - 19 ©

When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi he put this question to his disciples, ‘Who do people say the Son of Man is?’ And they said, ‘Some say he is John the Baptist, some Elijah, and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets’. ‘But you,’ he said ‘who do you say I am?’ Then Simon Peter spoke up, ‘You are the Christ,’ he said ‘the Son of the living God’. Jesus replied, ‘Simon son of Jonah, you are a happy man! Because it was not flesh and blood that revealed this to you but my Father in heaven. So I now say to you: You are Peter and on this rock I will build my Church. And the gates of the underworld can never hold out against it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven: whatever you bind on earth shall be considered bound in heaven; whatever you loose on earth shall be considered loosed in heaven.’

The martyrs had seen what they proclaimed

A sermon of St Augustine
This day has been consecrated for us by the martyrdom of the blessed apostles Peter and Paul. It is not some obscure martyrs we are talking about. Their sound has gone out into all the earth, and their words to the ends of the world. These martyrs had seen what they proclaimed, they pursued justice by confessing the truth, by dying for the truth.
The blessed Peter, the first of the Apostles, the ardent lover of Christ, who was found worthy to hear, And I say to you, that you are Peter. He himself, you see, had just said, You are the Christ, the Son of the living God. Christ said to him, And I say to you that you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my Church. Upon this rock I will build the faith you have just confessed. Upon your words, You are the Christ, the Son of the living God, I will build my Church; because you are Peter. Peter comes from petra, meaning a rock. Peter, “Rocky”, from “rock”; not “rock” from “Rocky”. Peter comes from the word for a rock in exactly the same way as the name Christian comes from Christ.
Before his passion the Lord Jesus, as you know, chose those disciples of his whom he called apostles. Among these it was only Peter who almost everywhere was given the privilege of representing the whole Church. It was in the person of the whole Church, which he alone represented, that he was privileged to hear, To you will I give the keys of the kingdom of heaven. After all, it is not just one man that received these keys, but the Church in its unity. So this is the reason for Peter’s acknowledged pre-eminence, that he stood for the Church’s universality and unity, when he was told, To you I am entrusting, what has in fact been entrusted to all. To show you that it is the Church which has received the keys of the kingdom of heaven, listen to what the Lord says in another place to all his apostles: Receive the Holy Spirit; and immediately afterwards, Whose sins you forgive, they will be forgiven them; whose sins you retain, they will be retained.
Quite rightly, too, did the Lord after his resurrection entrust his sheep to Peter to be fed. It is not, you see, that he alone among the disciples was fit to feed the Lord’s sheep; but when Christ speaks to one man, unity is being commended to us. And he first speaks to Peter, because Peter is the first among the apostles. Do not be sad, Apostle. Answer once, answer again, answer a third time. Let confession conquer three times with love, because self-assurance was conquered three times by fear. What you had bound three times must be loosed three times. Loose through love what you had bound through fear. And for all that, the Lord once, and again, and a third time, entrusted his sheep to Peter.
There is one day for the passion of two apostles. But these two also were as one; although they suffered on different days, they were as one. Peter went first, Paul followed. We are celebrating a feast day, consecrated for us by the blood of the apostles. Let us love their faith, their lives, their labours, their sufferings, their confession of faith, their preaching.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006


my goodness did I miss out this weekend. I knew that Nicole Kidman and Keith Uruban were getting married and I'm so glad for them! But wow, Jon Benet Ramsey's mother died over the weekend, along with Aaron Spelling (hope his production company will keep rolling out those tv shows we all love), and the most interesting death of the weekend: Pierce Marshall III (aka the guy who is suing Anna Nicole Smith for his daddy's money), this just proves to show you that you can't take it all with you. I wonder where this case will go now (i.e. his estate sues her and the lawyers get all the money).

We didn't go to the upstate as planned - the rain put a damper on that. But we met my parents in Columbia on Sunday to pick up my dad.

Yesterday he couldn't move his right arm very well so he stayed home. I came into work only to leave after daily mass since they are painting the Chancery with noxious paint. Why, oh why they won't close the building is beyond me. You can smell it from across the street. Even our canon-law Monsignor said we should close the building. Oh well, it't not up to us. My lovely little bos called me about 20 minutes ago and told me and a coworker to leave. I think I'm going to tough it out until after mass. Yesterday I went home and slept I felt so bad. I have a migraine like you won't believe.

So an update on my brother. He's now at 144lbs and it's supposed to be all muscle. Now this is the kid who a year ago did not weigh enough to make into the service. So that is good. His wife just HAD to go out there (TX) for his graduation and to stay. So she left everything (stroller, car seat, crib, highchair, pack N play, washer & dryer, furniture, etc..) they had (taking only a few baby clothes and a suitcase of her own clothes), spent all the money they had and bought two one-way tickets for her and her male friend for them to go out there. Two days out there she had no money for food and couldn't stay at the hotel any longer. She called my parents and my mother told her to go to social services on base. Now, this is the girl who is 7 1/2 months pregnant, the baby is transverse, left all her doctors up here, left the W.I.C. and medicaid and went to TX. She wasn't on Tri-care yet and hasn't seen a doctor. Real smart. My brother is still living in barracks but he is trying to get her an on base apartment. Social services gave her some canned goods, Brett moved her into another hotel and she is supposed to have an appointment sometime this week. Brett called my parents and told them more than likely he is being sent to the "Sandbox" (i.e. Iraq) as soon as he gets out of Tech School. He will get his orders in a week or so that will tell him what base he will be stationed at. So we just keep praying for the baby since the two parents don't have much common sense between the two of them.

on to the home.... this weekend we did a bit more landscaping and it is starting to really take shape. Even my dad made comment about it. Haven't really done more than that.

on to friends..... hop on over to Sc GirlyGirl's and check out her "Crazy Test". I flunked it so guess I'm not crazy! ;) I think the only one I answered to was about the older man question. But nothing is crazy about that. Just ask my DH!

well, back to smelling paint fumes!

Friday, June 23, 2006

Find Your Church

So in my Yahoo Group for women who wear headcoverings, one of the ladies shared this link with us. Below is the link and also my results. As you can see, I am 100% Roman Catholic! So try it out and be honest!

"Christian Traditions Selector"

Your results for "Christian Traditions Selector"
Percent Rank Item
(100%) 1: Roman Catholic
(69%) 2: Eastern Orthodox
(68%) 3: Anglican/Episcopal/Church of England
(68%) 4: Lutheran
(45%) 5: Presbyterian/Reformed
(32%) 6: Congregational/United Church of Christ
(31%) 7: Church of Christ/Campbellite
(22%) 8: Baptist (Reformed/Particular/Calvinistic)
(17%) 9: Methodist/Wesleyan/Nazarene
(12%) 10: Baptist (non-Calvinistic)/Plymouth Brethren/Fundamentalist
(12%) 11: Pentecostal/Charismatic/Assemblies of God
(9%) 12: Anabaptist (Mennonite/Quaker etc.)
(3%) 13: Seventh-Day Adventist


So if you would like a good laugh, head on over to my friend, SC Girly Girl's Blog. I would let your Wheaties settle in before you head on over - you just might loose them!!

It's just pretty good proof that cable t.v. has gone down the tubes!

So we are heading to the Upstate tomorrow morning. We have to pick up my dad who is coming to visit us for a week. My mom will come down next weekend to get him. It will be good to have him around. Hopefully we will also be able to pick up our new bed and bring back our new guest daybed as well.

My brother-in-law, Greg, called last night. Here is his picture (He's on the far right). Joe and I had to ribb him a little. He has been saying that he is coming down here to help start up our company. Well it's been 18 months. Every time he calls "I'm going to be there by the end of the month." Yesterday he was saying the same thing. He will be down by the end of June. I said, "Um, Greg, you do realize that is in SEVEN days, right?" So, we will see what happens, but I'm not holding my breath. And who knows? Maybe he will come down, help with the business, and make some single girl a lucky girl.

I will try to post again later this afternoon.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Notes and Observations

So Tuesday night we sold our Honda Civic. We pray that the car will give the young couple who purchased it many years of enjoyment.

While driving into the city yesterday morning, I noticed a few things. First, you would think that in a city as large as Charleston there would be some good radio stations - WRONG!! I have lived here almost a year and I have found ONE station and it is AM!! Ugh. Where is my B93.7, 93.3 The Planet, KISS 95.1,107.9 The LINK or the miriad of stations I had programed into my car. Heck, I could listen to Russ Cassell and WORD all day right about now.

While driving in I could also smell the marsh around the Ashley River. I asked Napoleon if he smelled and he said "No, why? You ask like that's a good thing." And it made me realize something. While I can't stand the Paper Mill sulfur smell when it lingers, it's still a "Charleston Smell" along with the Marsh. It's almost like perfume to me because I love being in Charleston and it is a smell that reaffirms that I am here. I think locals seem to forget that and take it for granted.

Like Joe and I. We've been down here since August of last year. It's been since January that we went to the beach,and December since we went to the Market. Now, we have been up and down King street alot. Usually because I'm going to the Pauline Books and Media store. And we usually go up Queen Street to go to Poogan's or something. I also walk down Broad to Burbage's or Queen Street Grocery for a sandwhich now and then.

Hopefully this summer we will tour around more. Now that we don't have to kill ourselves driving back and forth from Wellford and spending all weekend working on that house, we can live a little bit.

And maybe, just maybe, we won't be taking this beautiful city for granted.

Monday, June 19, 2006

Work, Work, Work.......

I had previously thought that after we had sold the Wellford home, we would slow down just a little. Nope. Last night we were at it again. We went to Lowe's around 6:30 and bought some lovely plants, mulch, and a new ice machine filter. Once we got home we started planting all the flowers as well as some of the plants I brought back from Wellford. I got the rose and canna lillies planted but not the day lillies and hosta. Hopefully this evening we will get those planted. We put down 4 bags of cypress mulch and I didn't realize how little it actually was. So we will definetly be buying more bags of it.

I started actually looking into it and in the last 3 months we have:

Hung two chandeliers
installed two lights
removed blinds in dining room
hung new drapes in dining room
removed the wallpaper from the dining room
painted the dining room
bought new furniture for the family room
painted the family room
new decoration in family room
removed blinds in family room
hung new curtains and wrought iron curtain rods in family room
hung new curtains in breakfast room (twice, actually)
new curtain in kitchen
removed the blinds from the breakfast room
removed wallpaper from 1/2 bath
painted and hung new decorations in foyer
begun working on new landscaping in front yard

This is all just in this house down here in Charleston and isn't including work on our home in Wellford or in Greer.

Now all we have to do is:
paint 1/2 bath
install new light and mirror in 1/2 bath
remove wallpaper from kitchen
paint kitchen, laundry room and breakfast area
finish trim work in family room
strip tongue oil, stain, and reapply tongue oil to dining room table

whew!!! Just writing all this makes me tired!!!

Tonight is my first board meeting of the Cathedral Women's Club, and my first meeting as Recording Secretary. I am looking forward to it and can't wait!! So with the meeting and the rain, it doens't look like we will be getting to any landscaping tonight!

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Just another weekend....

My wonderful parents came down to visit us this past weekend. It was so good to see them. They had spent the week with my grandparents in Garden City and came down here to help break up the drive home.

We did a little shopping yesterday and Joe and I purchased a metal hanging pot rack. We can't wait to get that up. The new kitchen curtains look fabulous and Joe and I put up one of the new kitchen lights on Wednesday; Joe and my dad did the other last night. They look SO good in our kitchen.

We are excited about the updates to our home security system. It's great and we love the new features. One of the new features is a medical alert pendant which my dad can wear when he comes to visit. That way, we can go to work and not worry about him because 911 is just a press of a button away. Plus we don't have to worry about our house while we are away.

I think sage green is the consensus for painting the kitchen. However, Sherwin Williams now has the Colors of Charleston in their paints and I think I chose one from there, but I can't remember the name. And no, I'm not going downstairs to pull out my Charleston Home magazine to look it up right now.

I think my DH is getting a little hungry for some lunch, so I'm now off to my second job of being a good wife.

Have a great Father's Day!!!

♥ Hapy Father's Day!!! ♥

Happy Father's Day to the BEST father (John, far right) and father-in law (Ray, far left) in the world!!

We love you!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006


It's Over! It's Final! We sold hour home in Wellford! We spent all weekend and yesterday moving and going to the closing!! We are so exhausted but are thankful to God that he allowed everything to go fairly smoothly.

We decided to keep my house in Greer as our little vacation cottage. That way, we have some place to go if there is a large hurricane but also when we go up to visit. Now when we go up it's because we want to, not because we HAVE to!! yeah!!

We purchased (at my favorite store) and hung a chandelier for our breakfast area several weeks ago. I had not been able to find matching lights fo rthe kitchen until Sat. We found our chandelier at the Lowe's in Spartanburg and saw that the finish is called Midnight Gold AND they had a matching light to go with it. So we bought two of these and are SO excited to change out the lights this week in our kitchen. With the new Waverly Mistral Redcurtains (similar to the valance on teh link but without the check)in the kitchen and the new lights all we have to do is strip the ugly 80's wallpaper and paint and we are good to go!! (except for new appliances which will come eventually)

We also got a new new sleighbed and new mattress and boxsprings. We will have to pick those up in a couple of weeks when we go back up. We have so much furniture that we want to bring back and swap out since we bought a lot when we "staged" the house. Now it gets to come back here!! But we will be patient. This coming weekend we are resting and having another visit from my parents.

Blessings to all!

Friday, May 19, 2006

Trust in the Lord

Proverbs 3:5-6"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, Lean
not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and
He shall direct your paths"

I haven't been blogging this week- that's because life sort of got turned upside-down,
inside-out, and all around!!!

On Wednesday I started my new job - full time. It's great, wonderful and I love it!!!!
The Lord has blessed us in SO many ways. Because on Wednesday we also got
an offer on the house. We took it and our home in Wellford is now


I'm excited also since my parents will be in town as Sunday is my Birthday! I just recieved a
beautiful basket from the Bishop, and roses from my sweet, DH!!

I can't wait to relax in my newly, decorated, beautiful home and enjoy
my time with my family!

Many, Many Blessings to you all!!!

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Thursday, May 11, 2006

New Fountain

So last night, Joe and I went on an impromtu shopping trip. I was looking for curtains for my kitchen that match some placemats that I have. We are so excited with the new furniture in the family! Hopefully this weekend, we will have the diningroom, family room and powder room complete! Well we ended up going to Belk's. I was told Never to register at Belk's and I know why. Service is horrible and they don't hardly carry anything. They no longer carry my everyday dishes (Pfaltzgraf Summer Breeze), my china (Lenox Opal Innocence) is outrageously priced, my crystal is cheaper online than in the store, etc.

Well, they no longer carry curtains and their selection of linens is pathetic. So I decided to go to Lowe's since I know they carry Waverly curtains. Yes, I should have tried Penny's since they carry TONS of curtains, but when you walk into Belk's at 8:30, you don't have time to go to Penny's.

Anyways, I found some similar curtains at Lowe's, but decided to wait. We went to the garden section, and we found our fountain! We saw it many months ago and should have bought it then, because every trip since, they haven't had it. They had it last night. Here it is link Click on the view larger image, it's fantastic. I set it up last night (Joe was much too tired from his holiday "Honey-Do" list. And we set it up tucked away near our patio. We were even able to open a window in the family room and hear it! Oh! With the outdoor lighting we have installed and the more lighting to come, our newly re-upholstered patio set (courtesy of moi), with the newly painted black wrought iron, we are going to have fabulous outdoor area!!!

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Illegal Immigrants

I have been away from being able to blog for a couple of days and wanted to weigh in my opinions on this matter. First, and foremost, I have respect for all peoples of all nations, gender, creed, etc… We are a country that (unless you are Native American) is made up almost entirely of immigrants. Bishop Baker, in his Good Friday Homily said we should be good Christians and welcome this immigrants. I agree full heartedly that we should welcome them, but straight to the local immigration office so that they can go through the proper steps of becoming citizens.

All of our families came over from somewhere in some point in time. Whether it was from France, England, Ireland, Spain, Italy, Slovak countries, etc… we all immigrated. But look at what our forefathers did. They did it according to the LAW. They became LEGAL citizens, most changed their name to sound “American”, and they all learned American English. They did not demand signs in French, Italian and Gaelic, etc… Could you imagine what would have happened to them? They would have been thrown out! Sent away on the next boat home. They even paid taxes on their wages. They did not expect a free ride. They expected to work for their “American Dream” and to be Americans.

Now, yes there are plenty of jobs in this country that I would not do, and they are welcome to them. But they should be citizens, or at least be documented and have a work permit, and be like everyone else. I was born, my parents got me a Social Security #, I went to work when I was 16 or 17. I have paid taxes on every job I have worked and I have filed taxes. I have paid into the failing Social Security plan. When I didn’t have health insurance – I had to pay the hospital bills. I’ve gotten no free ride from the government. These people do not pay income taxes, they do not pay Social Security, they do not help out with any social programs (Welfare, TANF, WIC, Food stamps, etc…), yet they take part in them. Why do you think it costs YOU so much money to go to the hospital? Because THEY go for free.

Every morning on my way to work, I see anywhere from 30-70 men standing around a gas station waiting for day labor. I have watched (while my husband gassed up across the street- we don’t support the other gas station at all) while trucks would pull up and these men would negotiate their pay for the day. Then they would hop in the back of the trucks and leave. I think the one of the ways to stop this problem is to go after these employers. While working for my former employer, I worked very closely with the SSA, and the HR dept. I quickly found out one way illegals are getting work. One way is by legitimate employers who are uneducated. Illegal immigrants found out that they can get a “Taxpayer Identification Number” from the IRS. They get a little card that looks like a SS Card but it’s issued by the IRS. And on it is a 9 digit number which looks just like a social. Only difference is that they start with either an 8 or a 9. Small time business owners wouldn’t notice. My former employer put out a company statement that unless they had a legitimate SS#, they wouldn’t be hired. That’s the way to go! These employers who hire (purposely) illegal immigrants should be penalized.

I hope that these protests are a “wake-up” call for Americans. I hope that by seeing these marches, we become more aware (by the sheer number of the masses) of how serious this problem is. I think that the laws of our nations should be enforced. Our police and government officials should use every force necessary to either pack them up and ship them out, or make them go through the immigration process. Illegal means AGAINST THE LAW. This is the “Land of the free” not “Land of Free”

P.S. I just found this on the web.
I love Sheriff Joe Arpaio. My aunt lives in Phoenix and has been telling us about him for years. I love what he has done for the county prison system out there. So when I was looking around on the Drudge Report, I saw this article.
Gotta Love Joe!


Casino Royale

So I found this on the internet. It is the new James Bond movie trailer. my DH and I both agree that it looks horrible. While we disagree on the best Bond, he is for Sean Connery and I am for Pierce Brosnan, we both agree Daniel Craig should never have been chosen. I think this is one Bond movie we will have to pass on.

Now, THIS is a movie I can't WAIT to come out!! I've been anticipating this since the night I saw X-Men II. It premieres five days after my b-day. So I know what I want!!! LOL! Only 3 weeks to go!!!

Friday, April 28, 2006

New Music

My DH loves the Chase Manhattan Credit Card Commercial with the couple who go from dating to old age. So last night I found the name of the song and this morning I have loaded the new video at the bottom just for him!

Now he can enjoy it everytime he visits, and not just when we watch CSI!

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Should there be a dress code for Mass?

Should there be a dress code for Mass? I believe so. It is a testament to faith and to obedience when one bends towards God and away from society and culture.

In 1921, Pope Benedict XV said this about the indecent dress of women at Holy mass:

“ cannot sufficiently deplore the blindness of so many women of every age and condition; made foolish by a desire to please, they do not see to what degree the indecency of the clothing shocks every honest man, and offends God. Most of them would formerly have blushed for those toiletries as for a grave fault against Christian modesty; now it does not suffice for them to exhibit them on public thoroughfares; they do not fear to cross the threshold of the churches, to assist at the holy sacrifice of the Mass, and even to bear the seductive food of shameful passions to the Eucharistic Table where one receives the heavenly author of purity.”

But to what extent is apparel considered modest? Even among ourselves we can disagree. Some women believe that pants are sufficient covering, others believe that necks, wrists, and ankles should be covered. We do, however, have an excellent interpretation of modest by a member of the hierarchy. On Sept. 24, 1956, the Cardinal Vicar of Pius XII standardized modesty in dress for women,
“A dress cannot be called decent which is cut deeper than two fingers breadth under the pit of the throat; which does not cover the arms at least to the elbows; scarcely reaches a bit beyond the knees. Furthermore, dresses of transparent materials are improper.”
Some may argue that this is pretty radical dress. While modest dress according to this may be difficult to find, I believe we should look to our motives. If they are pure and are to lead us to holiness, then we will find apparel which will be pleasing to God and we will not sin against modesty. We should remember that even though it is man’s responsibility for his own actions and desires, it is equally our responsibility to remember that the nature of a man is to be visually based and therefore visually stimulated. We should remember in choosing appropriate apparel that we do not sin against our fellow parishioners and be the stumbling block in their faith and distract their attention to the Holy Sacrifice.

Women are not the only ones who should be held to a high standard. Men are held to a higher standard. After every Scripture passage regarding how women should be is followed immediately by how the man should be.

Appropriate dress for men should be a coat and tie; or, at least, a collared shirt and nice slacks. Too many young men today wear pants with their underwear hanging out and tee-shirts which have inappropriate slogans.

Priests should be more forthcoming regarding speaking out about modesty. I have visited parishes in which there are signs which state that “Women wearing pants should not enter the Church,” as I have been to parishes where they have boxes of chapel veils that they pass out to the visitors on their way in to help “cover” the women.

In both parishes I have belonged to, the Pastor’s have spoken out against immodesty. They have done this both within their homilies and also within the parish bulletin. Recently, my current Pastor posted this in his weekly bulletin:

“APPROPRIATE DRESS IN CHURCH: The dress code is slipping somewhat and I would just like to call everyone’s attention to appropriate clothing for wear in church. Please remember that we are in the presence of Jesus Christ in the Most Blessed Sacrament, when we come into a Catholic Church. Here at the Cathedral, this should especially be true. Please use common sense in dress. “T”-shirts, especially those with messages in poor taste, are not what one would call dignified dress for the Eucharistic Presence. I am not asking for everyone to wear a very formal dress or a formal suit to Holy Mass but please let respect and reason prevail. Let us not be a source of distraction for others but rather a means of promoting prayer and respect for Our Lord. We are all called by God and our manner of dress should show our respect for the Presence of Christ in our midst. I thank you for your cooperation. God bless you for your respect for Our Lord.”

It is not exactly what the Cardinal Vicar pointed out, but this message is a start. Hopefully more priests will speak out and the women of the parishes will start to heed the message and turn away from sin. Matthew 5:27& 28 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” As women and brides of Christ, we should not continue to encourage men to break the seventh commandment. For in our dress we are as guilty of sin as the man who looks upon us.

Storms and Blessings

Last night, we recieved horrible storms here in Charleston, from hail and severe rain here at my office to 70 mph gusts of winds at our house. Last night at around 7:15, the power went out. It was not restored until about 6:30 this morning. I was in teh middle of nightly duties (including tryign to feed my husband) when the power went off. We had thought to try and wait it out and finally ended up having to go out to eat. It is amazing that two of hte seven neighborhoods in our "conglomerate" had power as did the stip center near our house. But as we travelled to Summerville, it was dark!! So we turned around and ate at Zaxby's. We did have cnadles and one of my husband's toys: a two million candle watt flashlight. But we survived and just showed to us that we have preparations to make for the upcomming 2006 Hurricane Season.


Today I found out two wonderful blessings. One is that a dear friend, MN is engaged and is marrying this September. It is so wonderful to hear of couples going to be united in the Sacrament of Matrimony. MN is such a sweet person and I can't wait to meet her fiance. We will pray for the permanence, faithfulness and fruitfulness of their very blessed marriage.

The second blessing of the day (and by no means lesser) is the veiling of a dear friend N. The Holy Spirit has touched her heart and she has begun veiling while praying. We shall pray for the continuation of God's blessing upon her, the faithfullness to continue veiling, her obedience to Christ, and the courage to continue against the constant stream of modern cutlure.

May God continue his blessings!

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


Recently a book has been brought to my attention. The title is: The Biblical Truth About America's Death Penalty By Dale S. Recinella. See it here on

This is an intersting book and I do say that I wish to read it and see what Racinella has to say.

One of the most interesting points I saw in the book was the correlation between the Bible Belt and executions. Almost 90% of executions from 1999 through 2003 have taken place in the Bible Belt. And ALL of the 2 juvenile executions since 1976 have taken place in the Bible Belt as well.

**Spoiler Alert** - Here is the last paragraph of the book:
"People of biblical faith must abolish the American death penalty, and we must do so in our time. Moratorium is a way of stopping the practcie while others of biblical faith become more educated to the biblical truth, a truth that demands nothing less than abolition." Dale Recinella

Hmm... makes me want to read the book. He does a lot of quoting Scripture and from different translations.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states:

“If bloodless means are sufficient to defend human lives against an aggressor and to protect public order and the safety of persons, public authority should limit itself to such means, because they better correspond to concrete conditions of the common good and are more in conformity to the dignity of the human person.” (CCC 2267)

Here is a letter the Bishop of Charleston wrote last year regarding an execution. Click Here for letter


All Decked out and can't wait to go.....

I am SO looking forward to tonight! Tonight is the Cathedral Women's Club Annual Benefit. If I wasn't so scatter-brained yesterday I would have remembered to turn in my raffle tickets. One of the Raffles is for a Moo Roo hangbag. Would LOVE to add that to my collection. Click Here to see more about Moo Roo.

So for tonight I chose a neutral beige August Silk top with a full, flouncy, Studio by Liz Claiborne skirt. The skirt has large tan, black and grey flowers. I love the way the skirt moves when I walk, makes it very dressy. I added my Wedding Pearls (yes, the ones Joe drove to Savannah to purchase the day before our wedding to say that I was a Proverb's 31 wife), and my new Tiffany & Co. sterling braclet.

Throw in my black semi-flats, white snood and my Burberry check handbag, and I am all set!!!

Since I've been tapped to be the next Secretary, I thought it would be nice to jazz things up a little. So yes, I am wearing a "little" bit of makeup.

So I can't wait!!!!!! Why, oh why, isn't it 5:00 yet?????


Southern Cuisine

So this little Southern girl LOVES to cook. Albeit when I have time. Usually by the time I get home it's whatever I can make quickly. So for the CWC Benefit tonight, I said I would bring Potato Salad or my Cabernet Sauvignon Chocolate Cake. So when I got home last night, with no wine I decided to make Potato salad. Now, I do not eat Potato Salad because most people put nasty things in it like raw onions (yuck!). But a couple of months ago, Joe had to bring some for work, so I whipped up a batch from scratch using a recipe I created on my own. It was good and even I ate it (no onions). So last night I started making it and wouldn't you know that I got wrapped up in a show and over boiled the potatos. So when Life gives you Lemons, you make Lemonade. Well, I had boiled potatos- you guessed it - Mashed Potatos. So I poured in the Mayo, Milk, and Butter and whippped them right up. I even added a little French's Fried Onions and some crumbled bacon. MMMMmmmm.... Even Joe couldn't stay away from them.

So I am definetly looking forward to tonight!!!

Monday, April 24, 2006

Modest Swimwear

So I was googling around and came across THIS blog and post. It is amazing how culture is trying to dictate how women should dress. We should all look to Christ and Not Culture to get our influences. Look at what Mary said at Fatima! She said there would be "Certain fashions will be introduced that will offend Our Lord very much."

Hello People! Wake up and smell the incense!!!I see the girls strumping in to Mass. You almost want to take a sheet and cover them up they are SO immodest. You are Catholic Because you Believe in the Real Body and Blood of Christ (which NO other church on Earth has, BTW) and yet, you go to him practically naked? For Shame!!!!!

Do you NOT think that HE sees you in your day-to-day activities??? Yes, that does mean He sees you while you are frolicking on the beach! Why do you feel the need to lay around the beach with little more than 12 inches (sometimes less) of material? Why do you want men to gawk at you? Yes, I KNOW men are the ones CHOOSING to look, but WHY give them something to look at??

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Hinder Not the Little Ones......

Tom: 'We're Just Scientologists'
Source Article
Well what can you expect from Non-Christians? I would hope that Mr. and Mrs. Holmes will step in along with every priest from her home parish and remind Katie that the soul of the child is a stake!!!

Of course, fundamentalists will argue that who cares? It's just a baby. You have to be an adult to be "born again." First and foremost, in the Gospel of Mark 10:14-15 we read "Let the children come to me; do not prevent them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Amen, I say to you, whoever does not accept the kingdom of God like a child 2 will not enter it." In John 14:15, 21 "If you love me, you will keep my commandments. Whoever has my commandments and observes them is the one who loves me. And whoever loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and reveal myself to him."

Now we also read about Lydia and how "She was baptized, with her household" (Acts 16:15), the Phillipian Jailer whom Paul and Silas had converted to the faith was baptized that night along with his household. We are told that "the same hour of the night . . . he was baptized, with all his family" (Acts 16:33). And in his greetings to the Corinthians, Paul recalled that, "I did baptize also the household of Stephanas" (1 Cor. 1:16).

No where does it say in Scripture that the Husband and Wife only were baptized. NO! The ENTIRE household was baptized - moms, dads, slaves, servants, children of all ages - EVERYONE in the household was baptized. As babies, all the Jews were circumcized as part of the covenant with God. Why would God now NOT want the babies to be within his covenant? It doesn't make sense.

As Catholics who do not hold strictly to Sola Scriptura as Protestants do, we can also look to what the Church Fathers wrote about. Origen, for instance, wrote in the third century that "according to the usage of the Church, baptism is given even to infants" (Holilies on Leviticus, 8:3:11 [A.D. 244]). The Council of Carthage, in 253, condemned the opinion that baptism should be withheld from infants until the eighth day after birth. Later, Augustine taught, "The custom of Mother Church in baptizing infants is certainly not to be scorned . . . nor is it to be believed that its tradition is anything except apostolic" (Literal Interpretation of Genesis 10:23:39 [A.D. 408]).

None of the Church fathers were outraged at infant baptism - they PROMOTED it!!! The Bible NEVER says "Faith in Christ is necessary for salvation except for infants"; it simply says, "Faith in Christ is necessary for salvation."

So, to put it plainly: the Catholic Church is merely continuing the tradition established by the first Christians, who heeded the words of Christ: "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of God" (Luke 18:16).


Tuesday, April 18, 2006

New Scipture to Ponder

So I am constantly looking for new Scipture to ponder. Today has brought me to a new verses to reiterate my new "liefstyle" and also help reaffirm my faith and beliefs.

The first is Deuteronomy 22:5 "A woman shall not wear an article proper to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman's dress; for anyone who does such things is an abomination to the LORD, your God."

Wow, I have never seen this before! I have known (recently) of Our Lady's message at Fatima that "Certain Fashions will be introduced that will offend Our Lord very much." My dear friend "C" and I were talking the other day about what brought her to wearing skirts and dresses was the fact she was in a store and she could not tell the gender of the people in front of her. I myself am quite shocked at young ladies who I see walking around. Do young women have such low self esteem that they feel they must show off every part of their body? I wish some priests would turn women away from communion which dress inappropriately.

It has been nearly a week since I wore pants (and months since I have worn them to work). I have only been wearing them at home and mostly when I've been working in the yard or on the dining room. But this weekend I bought a long jean skirt by Covington which is SO comfortable. I have noticed how feminine I feel in skirts and dresses. Not scanky, skimpy things, but nice, modest dresses and skirts. Men are more apt to smile and open doors for me. I actually feel respected more than if I am wearing pants.

Let us remember all the immodest in our prayers, that they will become like Mary.


Shout Out!

Here's a little shout out to my dear friend "Anastasia". Click to check out her blog at Southern Catholic Convert.

I did notice that on the right hand side she posted "Appearing At" and she forgot to mention weekly (and sometimes nightly)for dinner at the home of your's truly.

Her story of her conversion from the Jehovah's Witness cult is inspiring. I am hoping that the more people who "nag" her about completing Part II, the sooner she will get it done!


We love you "A"!!!!!!!!!!

Gotta LOVE this town!

So this morning I ended up with nothing for lunch, so I was able to walk down to Burbage’s to grab something. For those not “in the know”, Burbage’s is a wonderful little “Mom & Pop” grocery store here in downtown Charleston. It is on the corner of Broad and Savage. I love walking down there. They have fresh sandwiches from their deli, cookies and fresh fruit. Now, I would LOVE to walk over to Poogan’s Porch, I know it’s touristy but I love their Shrimp & Grits or I could walk to 82 Queen (where we had our wedding reception) and have a bowl of She Crab Soup. But I think either option might get me skinned alive before I get home. (sweetheart I PROMISE I won’t go there without you!) ;)

I also love walking down there (to Burbage’s) because this IS the heart of Charleston. Broad Street is the line in Charleston. If you live “South of Broad” you are living quite well.

Joe and I would love to live here in downtown, but unfortunately we do not have the means to pay for a million dollar mortgage. Make that 2.4 Million to be exact for the homes that are right around here.

I love walking around this city. I love looking at my beautiful parish, the Cathedral of St. John the Baptist, the homes and definitely the architecture. Charleston is so much more than Meeting, East Bay and Market streets. Since tourism has picked up dramatically over the past several weeks, Joe and I have discovered new routes in and out of downtown. This is to avoid all the tourists and carriages that are everywhere.

It’s a little chilly today, so I am not enjoying my lunch in the gardens. I am actually eating while I type. There is quite a bit of cloud cover and hopefully that will go away.

Blessings from the heart of Charleston!

Easter Break

After having a ½ day on Holy Thursday, all of Good Friday and Easter Monday off, I am now back at work. This time was a great time of relaxation, prayer, and spiritual and emotional bonding for my husband and I. The early part of our break was like a mini honeymoon which was wonderful; I think it has really renewed our relationship. Joe got sick Saturday around mid-afternoon and continued until yesterday evening. We went shopping for some new clothes for me Friday evening and Saturday around lunch. I am SO excited!!! I have some beautiful new skirts and dresses. I went through my closet and took out all my winter clothes and am in the process of boxing them up. And I have made one of several trips to Good Will to donate all my “unsuitable” clothing.

Last week I ordered a dozen new crocheted snoods. They came in on Saturday and I am SO excited!!!!!! I now have 4 black (5 counting my old one), 1 white, 2 blue, 1 yellow, 2 red, 1 hot pink, and 1 purple. Sometime in the near future, I will be ordering a couple of different types of veils. I think something similar to the Charity Veil on website or a couple of others that Joe had picked out.

Joe has been absolutely wonderful during this whole process. He is so supportive of me and is really my backbone. I feel like everyone is staring at me when we are in public and I’m starting to let go of that anxiety. I have found that it is a great way to witness to people regarding my faith.

Many Blessings to you all!!!!

Thursday, April 13, 2006

The Controversy over "Washing of the Feet"

From the Charlotte Observer March 31, 2006
Bishop: Foot-washing for men only
Some parishioners, priests question why women being left out

Religion Editor
The head of the Roman Catholic Diocese of Charlotte is reminding priests that only men's feet are to be washed at Holy Thursday services, a move creating a buzz among many N.C. Catholics this Lenten season.

"I have vowed respect and obedience to my bishop. With sadness, I will obey Bishop (Peter) Jugis, with apologies to the women of St. Ann's parish," the Rev. Conrad Hoover of St. Ann Catholic Church in Charlotte said Thursday.

"I think it's ridiculous," said Jenifer Register, a member of St. Gabriel Catholic Church in Charlotte, who describes herself as "fired up" over the issue. "I feel that women are a huge part of the church. The church would not survive without women."

Jugis on Thursday designated diocesan spokesman David Hains to explain his position.

Hains said Jugis is following Vatican guidelines in reminding priests that foot-washing is for men only on Holy Thursday, this year on April 13. Holy Thursday, he added, reflects what happened at the Last Supper, when Jesus washed the feet of the 12 disciples, all men, as a symbol of servanthood.

Hains said Jugis issued the policy to the 46-county diocese for the first time under his leadership last year. This Lenten season, though, the reaction among many Catholics has been more pronounced with many priests and parishioners questioning the policy.

Asked if there is a mechanism in place for priests who choose not to follow the reminder, Hains said, "There is an assumption that the priests will follow the norms."

The norms vary from one diocese to another.

Bill Ryan, a spokesman of the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops in Washington, said bishops in each of the nation's 195 dioceses can set their own foot-washing guidelines. The choices involve not just gender, but number. Some, like Jugis, remind priests that the ritual is to be limited to 12 men, while others welcome all who want to participate.

Ryan said his office doesn't keep track of how many dioceses restrict the practice to men.

It's men only in the Roman Catholic Diocese of Charleston, which covers all of South Carolina. "The universal norm for the Church is that when a priest opts to perform the ritual of washing of feet, he is to wash the feet of men in imitation of Jesus' washing the feet of the Apostles," diocesan media relations director Stephen Gajdosik wrote in an e-mail to the Observer.

The Raleigh diocese allows each priest to decide whether to wash the feet of men only, or extend an invitation to women. Bishop Joseph Gossman washes the feet of men and women at the Holy Thursday Mass at Sacred Heart Cathedral in Raleigh.

In Atlanta, Archbishop Wilton Gregory extends an invitation to women -- reversing the men-only practice presided over by now-retired Atlanta Archbishop John Donoghue.

Donoghue, when he was bishop in Charlotte, created a furor in 1989 when his order to exclude women from foot-washing ceremonies led to protests outside St. Patrick Cathedral and a small alternative service in a home, where women's feet were washed.

James Patout Burns Jr., who teaches at Vanderbilt Divinity School in Nashville, Tenn., said the debate over foot-washing reflects a deeper rift in the U.S. Catholic church between conservatives and liberals. Beyond foot-washing, he said, the issue is the role of women in the church.

Charlotte, he said, may be welcoming a growing number of Catholics from other areas with less traditional views. But that likely wouldn't make a bishop budge.

"He doesn't work for them," Burns said. "He works for the guy in Rome."

Jugis' reminder is leading priests and parishes to embrace different strategies for what is considered an optional rite.

The Rev. Ed Sheridan of St. Gabriel Catholic Church in Charlotte said his Providence Road parish will drop foot-washing from Holy Thursday Mass.

David Pitt, who teaches theology at Belmont Abbey College in Belmont, said he hopes the controversy doesn't push Catholics in the 300,000-member Charlotte diocese to use public worship as a political tool one way or the other. Whether a parish washes the feet of men or women, whether they wash 12 men's feet or anyone who wants to participate, Pitt believes the deeper meaning is the same: "The intent really is to express continuing love and service."

Teresa Berger, who teaches theology at Duke Divinity School in Durham, questioned whether the rite should be restricted to men.

"If we are trying to duplicate what Jesus did," Berger said, "then we should find not only 12 men, but 12 Jewish men, preferably 12 first-century Jewish men."

Holy Thursday, also known as Maundy Thursday, is marked by observances in Catholic and Protestant churches. Though foot-washing is done in both, it generally is more prevalent among Catholics.

As described in the 13th chapter of John in the New Testament, Jesus washes the disciples' feet and says to them: "For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you."

I think this is getting way out of hand in the Church here in America. The Liberal Feminist Agenda needs to stay out of the Church. But, on the other hand, we are their largest target. Jesus washed 12 MALE disciples. Now, we can't go around digging up "first century Jewish men" now can we? And didn't Jesus say "Do this in Remembrance of Me" during the last supper? And doesn't he say "For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you?" So is the Church to "pick and chose" which acts of Jesus to adhere to?

The Bishop's Liturgy Committee issued the following statement on February 16, 1987: has become customary in many places [in the United States] to invite both men and women to be participants in this rite in recognition of the service that should be given by all the faithful to the church and to the world. the United States, a variation in the rite developed in which not only charity is signified but also humble service.

Why, Oh Why must women feel that they need to carve themselves a place out of the church? Women should not be priests, deacons nor have their feet washed. St. Paul actually tells us to be quiet in Church. I really don't like Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion, but I know that it would take forever and a day to distribute it if the priest was the only one doing it (unless we went back to communion rails - which I would LOVE!). Now this is my opinion and probably that of my husband. I'm sure that many people disagree with this issue. If Jesus had wanted women - he would have chosen women! It was more acceptable in that time period to have women priests!!!

Laying down our beliefs to the culture and liberal movements is only going to destroy the Church.
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